I love fall.

 

Going through storage unit searching for…

Stumbled on a box filled with Strengths-based leadership, Myers Briggs, etc

 

It brought me back to a time when I searching for my purpose - the thing I came to this planet to do - be the woman I came here to be. I knew I was here to transform the world but I wasn’t clear on what my zone of genius was. I knew I had gifts but I also knew I’d only shared a fraction of who I was and tapped into a fraction of what I was capable of. 

 

In my twenties and early thirties, I struggled with owning and embodying my gifts. If you don’t know my story,

 

From the time I could remember, I wanted to be a veterinarian. I took classes to prepare myself for vet school, volunteered at animal organizations, interned at a vet hospital, and spent my waking days with animals. I thought that being a veterinarian was my purpose. So, when I couldn’t get into vet school, I was lost. From there, my path to finding my purpose was riddled with anxiety. 

 

At that time, I believed I was created for one thing and my job was to find that one thing - my purpose in life. Once I found my purpose, I was convinced I’d feel fulfilled, be happy, be prosperous, and have a meaningful life. 

 

I wanted so badly to feel fulfilled, to be happy, to be prosperous that I spent every hour I could searching for my purpose. I had no idea what it was. But I believed that if I found it, it would transform my life and make me feel better. The ironic thing was that I put so much pressure on myself to find the one thing that would make me happy that it caused me to feel unhappy. 

 

I looked outside of myself for the answer - Myers Briggs tests, career coaches, strengths-based leadership tests, enneagrams. I wanted those tests to tell me who I was, who I came here to be, and what I came here to do. But they didn’t. 

 

I didn’t realize at the time that No test can do that. I had to turn within, do the spiritual work of remembering who I was and allow the Divine to guide me to the answers.

 

And it took me a while to understand who I am and what gifts I came here to express.

 

Which takes me back to my storage unit, sitting on the cold concrete floor surrounded by boxes.

 

As I held my dusty strengths finder results in my hands, staring at the words: competition, commanding, achiever, persuasive, input - I understood why I felt like an imposter. The qualities listed in these tests are 85% masculine traits. I could hardly relate to the words they used to describe me.

 

If they had described me as sensitive, nurturing, intuitive, an advocate, and strategic - then yes. I would’ve felt like it described me. But commanding, competitive, and a maximizer? No.

 

It’s no wonder ambitious women feel like they have imposter syndrome. Because we are imposters! 

 

We have imposter syndrome not because we aren’t confident in our abilities but because we don’t even know what our true abilities are. We’ve forgotten what they are. 

 

By definition, an imposter is someone who pretends to be someone else. We are leading and building our businesses like men because we’ve been told that we have to in order to succeed financially. 

 

We are told through leadership tests that our valuable qualities are masculine qualities. 

 

These very same leadership tests don’t even include an equally balanced representation of feminine and masculine qualities, suggesting that feminine gifts have no place in the workplace. 

 

And so, we hide our feminine qualities and act like men. We stop being ourselves. 

 

We feel impostery because we aren't being our true selves. Instead of expressing our unique feminine gifts, we are suppressing them or "managing" them (managing our emotions and feelings).  

 

Today, business and money are overpowered by masculine energy…and it’s come at a huge cost to the Feminine (just look at the rate of burnout, anxiety, and the effects on nature).

 

So, if you’re a woman who’s feeling like you have imposter syndrome. 

 

I say this respectfully, You don't have imposter syndrome. You are an imposter. 

 

And it’s time to change that. It’s time to show up authentically in money and business. Because the alternative, leading and building wealth and businesses like a man is freakin exhausting and it’s burning us out and it’s making financial success so much harder than it needs to be. 

 

Creating financial success will be so much easier when we remember that we, women, are the epitome of wealth. 

 

Centuries ago, the world once honored and revered the feminine as the symbol of wealth. 

 

We see this in our history.

 

The first bank was a temple to the Goddess Juno Moneta and priestesses collected the money. 

 

We see this in our language.

 

Abundance comes from the Latin word “abundo” which means overflow. Currency comes from the Latin word “currere” kuh-REH-reh which means flow. Flow is associated with water and water is feminine. 

 

The root of the word prosperous is to flourish and blossom, which is also feminine.

 

The root of the word wealth means well, whole, and significantly valuable, which is who YOU are.

 

Women are literally the embodiment of wealth. 

 

Now, let’s look at businesses. All financially successful businesses have been birthed by individuals who prioritized connection, led with passion, and were deeply connected to their creative power and intuition – all inherently feminine qualities. 

 

These revelations  - remembering who I truly am in my wealth, seeing the glaring omission of feminine gifts from leadership tests - inspired me to create a feminine strengths-based leadership list - a list of inherently natural feminine leadership qualities.

 

I reflected on my 20 years of experience and the women I worked with from entry-level to executive level throughout many different industries, I examined the Divine Feminine archetype traits, and noted what was missing from leadership tests, and created my signature and proprietary Unique Feminine Gifts List.

 

I identified 40 unique feminine gifts that represent a woman rooted in her power and divided them into 4 quadrants: embodiment, connection, strategic, and inspired action - 10 gifts in each quadrant.

 

I then help the women I coach identify which of those gifts come naturally to them. We then create a strategy that scales their business by embodying those gifts. In other words, the action they take is aligned with the gifts that come naturally to them. It’s inspired action meets aligned action. And so they meet and exceed their financial and business goals with so much flow, ease, joy, and in shorter amounts of time.

 

Just this past week, I helped a coaching client identify her unique feminine gift as - a relationship - Up to that point, she was forming transactional relationships, very masculine. She switched to connecting as a friend and was invited to submit an RFP for a dream project and client that’s looking really promising that she’ll get the consulting contract. We built her strategy around her unique feminine gift. It felt easy and natural and she became magnetic.

 

It doesn’t have to be hard. It’s not meant to be hard. We’re taught that we have everything within us to thrive. The problem is that we haven’t been taught to look for our value and all the gifts within us so it’s easy to overlook them when it comes to embodying them in business and money.

 

your unique feminine qualities that when you embody them will make your next financial milestone whether $20k or $100k months so easy and effortless. It’s truly a game-changer.

 

Because you are being true to you. 

 

If you’d like our list, I’ll drop a link in the show notes so you can identify your unique feminine gifts and begin weaving them into your business and money strategies. 

And if you enjoyed this podcast episode, please leave a 5-star review. Take a snapshot of your review and email it to info@jenwhitaker.com. As a thank you, you’ll receive my free Wealthy Like A Woman guided meditation.

Jennifer Whitaker (00:01.614)
All right. Well, my guest today is Lauren Johnson. Lauren is an advisor keynote speaker. She works with CEOs, professional athletes and Fortune 500 companies through one -to -one coaching, workshops, international speaking engagements, so many things. She has received her master's degree in performance psychology and has worked with various leaders and organizations with an

list of the New York Yankees, Google the US women's national soccer team, among many others. And she helps individuals become elite decision makers because her belief is you become elite by choice, not by chance, which I love that. And we'll talk more about that. Lauren joins me today to have a rich conversation about your imperfect impact.

and transcending the fear of failure and imperfection. Welcome, Lauren.

Lauren Johnson (01:02.48)
Awesome, thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited for this.

Jennifer Whitaker (01:06.046)
I am too. And what I love about you is that you have this beautiful balance between this mental resiliency and mindset strategies and this nurturing warm personality. It's like the mother side of you that comes out as well. And I know that resonates with so many of the women that are in my world because they're typically high performing women who really are craving more of that balance as well. And so you really embody that. And I just am really grateful that we have

women like you that can really speak to the work that you do while also having that nurturing mother vibe to you because you are a mother. You have a sweet little boy. How old is he?

Lauren Johnson (01:46.206)
He's gonna be two in a month. It's crazy.

Jennifer Whitaker (01:48.03)
my gosh. Well, did you I mean, I can imagine that all the work that you've done all the training that you've done all the educational background that you have has prepared you to do a lot around this mindset work. But I imagine that there is nothing like motherhood that prepares you for mindset work.

Lauren Johnson (02:08.614)
Literally nothing like motherhood is quite literally a big fat mirror to point out all the areas you still need to work on. I love motherhood. It's equal parts, fulfilling, challenging, amazing, enlightening. And so it has added to all of the things that I have learned about myself and revealed many others I still need to continue to explore.

Jennifer Whitaker (02:35.842)
Yeah, what is something that you've learned within Mindset Work from motherhood?

Lauren Johnson (02:41.484)
my gosh, just how important my responses are to those around me. And I coach this a lot from a leadership perspective, but leadership in the workplace starts from leading at home. And I just, I'm watching this little sponge in front of me, you know, just soak up all of my responses to things. And when I'm, when I,

Jennifer Whitaker (02:48.972)
Hmm.

Lauren Johnson (03:08.99)
have a poor reaction to something or I get triggered about something, that response actually causes me to go look deeper because I'm like, hold on. If I can't respond effectively, I need to go figure out why. What is the root system underneath this? I often refer to it with my clients as the weed and the root. The weed is what we see, but the root are the systems that have been in place for long before the weed ever showed itself.

A lot of times we'll cut it off at the top, but if we do not go and address the roots at some point, it's just going to continue to grow back. I think it's a motherhood has really revealed a lot of new root systems that I was like, Hmm, I didn't know you were here or I haven't seen you shown up in this way. I should go get curious about.

Jennifer Whitaker (04:02.272)
Yeah, it sounds like I'd like that you use the word curiosity because that's word that kept coming up for me too is that it looks like you really value curiosity. Is that what led you into the work that you have now?

Lauren Johnson (04:14.794)
Yeah. I mean, I was an athlete my whole life. I played soccer at the collegiate level and it was always so fascinating to me the question around why some athletes made it and why others didn't. Because typically when you reach those higher levels, everyone's talent is equal or at least very, very slightly different. But what kept players playing or getting positions or

getting more playing time had little to do with their ability and a lot to do with their actions. And so how they responded to things, how long it took them to get back after a bad play, how they treated the people around them even when they weren't performing well. And so I saw that reliability, consistency, those recognizable patterns in people.

Those are the things that kept you playing as like when paired with talent and when paired with skill and when paired with development. But oftentimes the talent and skill didn't, it wasn't that alone that got them.

Jennifer Whitaker (05:24.423)
That's so fascinating. Can you tell us a little bit about your journey to becoming a mental coach?

Lauren Johnson (05:31.048)
Yeah, so like I said, played soccer my whole life and it was actually third game into my senior year when I received my fifth concussion. And I like right when it happened, I like knew, I knew I got one. Of course I'm like, my God, please don't say I had another one because I just come back. Like it was third game in, like I had just been back. I just got back from my fourth concussion and they took me to go get a brain scan.

And then our all just walks in and he's like, Lauren, I'm so sorry. It's not safe for you to play anymore. And like here I was, I was like, okay, like, well, I just need a second opinion. And he goes, no, no, no, I don't think you understand. He said, Lauren, do you want to remember your name when you're 40? And I was like, man, that I wasn't expecting that. And it kind of really brought me to reality.

This was worse than I thought it was. And so that's when I realized, well, I need to put my health first. And so even though I was still a part of the team, I just played a very different role. Right now I'm on the bench, I'm not in games, and I'm just playing a very supportive role. I'm getting waters, I'm setting up cones, I'm doing all the things to support my teammates. Because after all, they were still my team. I couldn't just abandon them. And while I was there, here I am an athlete in pursuit, I was getting a little bored.

I'm like, okay, I love supporting my team, but I want something to challenge me. So I decided to take an elective course in sports psychology. And it completely changed things for me. It was as if somebody was holding up a mirror. I talk about mirrors in motherhood. This was the first one that was held up to me. And it was this moment where I thought, my gosh, who would I have been if I would have known these things? What kind of teammate, what kind of athlete, what kind of student, what kind of friend would I have been if I would have known these things?

And then I thought, how many people can I help now that I do? And that's what sparked me to pursue a master's degree in performance psychology. And so fast forward a couple of years, I get my master's degree and I'm like ready to like change the world one positive thought at a time, you know? And so I'm like, okay, I'm going to, I'm literally going to solve everyone's problems. I get out of grad school and I have two job offers on the line, which was like amazing, right? Like that is a grad student's dream.

Lauren Johnson (07:57.074)
I'm like, I got options, baby. Like this is nice. And so one option, was, you know, it was fantastic, but the other one was just better suited for me. The only catch was it was going to take about six months for me to get placed in that position. And I was like, you know what? That's okay. I get nice like summer break, extra long summer break. Like let's do it. So I say yes to that one, say no to the other. Six months goes by. I don't hear anything.

And I'm like a little confused. So I reach out and I was like, Hey, just checking in to see when I should be expecting, you know, to be placed in my role. And that's when I get the email that said, we're sorry. The job is no longer available.

Lauren Johnson (08:46.78)
And honestly, like my world just like stopped.

First, I was like, were you even gonna tell me? Like, I'm not certain they would have even told me. Like here, they told me you got the job and now they're saying it's not available. Like, I'm not even certain they would have told me if I didn't reach out. So number one, upsetting there. But number two, I was like, well, I can't go back. The other role has been filled. It's been six months. Like, they already found somebody. I call everyone under the sun that I know. And I keep hearing the same thing. Lauren, you just need experience. And I was like,

Jennifer Whitaker (09:03.074)
you

Jennifer Whitaker (09:13.016)
Right.

Lauren Johnson (09:21.598)
Yeah, what do you think I'm trying to get? But you know, no one would give me experience. There wasn't as many opportunities as there are today. And so I was like, all right, well, I got to figure something out because at this point, student loans are coming up. I don't have a job. I don't, you know, I have to like rethink everything. So I decide to get a job at Starbucks just to get some of my bills paid while I figure it out. And one day I'm working in the Starbucks drive -through and my entire

life changed. When you're working the drive -through, it is your job to entertain the customer while their drink is being made. This gentleman pulls up and I'm chatting it up while my coworker is making his drink. And he says, so are you in school? Which was a fair question. Most people were. And I said, no, actually I just graduated. You know, here I am. Like finally someone who cares. Like I cannot wait to share.

Jennifer Whitaker (10:00.192)
Mm

Jennifer Whitaker (10:17.208)
Thanks.

Lauren Johnson (10:19.08)
with this guy, my studies. I'm like, yes. And so I'm like, yeah, actually I got my degree in performance psychology. And he just starts laughing at me. Like full on belly laughing. And I'm one of those people, I don't really mind an awkward or confrontational question. So once he finished catching his breath, I asked him, I said, what's so funny? And he said,

You got one of those degrees you'll never use.

Jennifer Whitaker (10:52.877)
Wow.

Lauren Johnson (10:54.922)
I can only imagine what I looked like. I wish somebody had a camera to show me what my face looks like in the moment, but it couldn't have been pregnant. I couldn't believe this guy said this to me. It hit me like a thousand bricks. I went back. I couldn't even hand him his drink. I had to my coworker hand him his drink. I walked away. You know when someone says something to you and then it repeats in your brain like a broken record and you just ruminate on it?

Jennifer Whitaker (11:04.398)
Right, right.

Jennifer Whitaker (11:24.311)
Of course,

Lauren Johnson (11:24.446)
day in and day out. So my brain just started ruminating. And every time I re -experienced the story in my head, I re -experienced all the emotions and I started getting more and more pissed and more and more upset. And then I had this moment where I was pissed because I was pissed. I was like, this guy, you don't even know this guy. He doesn't even know you. Why are you giving him so much power over you? And that's when I had the light.

And I realized I wasn't upset because he was rude. I was upset because he was right.

Jennifer Whitaker (11:58.626)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (12:01.322)
You're not going to get very far if you turn around at your first sign of adversity. And there I was, sitting at Starbucks, not pursuing another avenue, just waiting for a new job to fall in my lap. And I had this moment of like confrontation with myself. I'm like, who are you to think that you can go and coach people through adversity when you can't even coach yourself? And so that evening, I Googled how to start your own consulting company.

Jennifer Whitaker (12:13.506)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (12:22.978)
Wow.

Lauren Johnson (12:30.928)
And I started my own consulting company knowing nothing about it. But I was like, okay, if the opportunity, if I can't get the opportunity, if I can't have it come to me, I need to go to it. So I started my consulting company with the sole purpose of building a resume. And I went after all these different like clients, specifically baseball, because I knew I wanted to work in baseball. And I got a lot of nos, but every once in while I got a yes.

Jennifer Whitaker (12:43.501)
us.

Lauren Johnson (12:59.75)
And when I did, capitalized and over a year's time, I actually was recommended to interview for the Yankees job and I got it. And next thing you know, I'm shipping myself out to Florida to go work for the New York Yankees. It was the craziest, most magical ride I have ever been on.

Jennifer Whitaker (13:21.28)
Looking back on it now, do you feel like your journey was always leading up to this? Like what we define as failures perhaps were divine redirection?

Lauren Johnson (13:33.546)
It's, you know, you can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking back. And I now understand how every point taught me something or developed something in me or made me exercise something that I wouldn't normally exercise in a way that's allowed me to get to where I am. Every setback created an opportunity to skill build. sitting in the know is hard.

Jennifer Whitaker (13:47.181)
and

Lauren Johnson (14:03.54)
Being told no every day, being ignored, being like, that is hard stuff. But boy, when you get a yes, feels dang good.

Jennifer Whitaker (14:15.242)
Absolutely. What keeps you going when you hear those no's or what do you recommend to people who continuously hear those no's and rather than giving up, just waiting for that yes.

Lauren Johnson (14:25.748)
There's something competitive in me that says not most people will do it, but I can. And there was a story I heard that I think aligns so well with this. It was actually from Robert Hurt -Szabek from Shark Tank. I love this show, by the way. Love Shark Tank. And Robert Hurt -Szabek, they were listening to it as Gentleman Pitch's Coffee Company. And one by one, every shark was saying no.

Jennifer Whitaker (14:39.636)
You

Lauren Johnson (14:50.602)
And this guy, could tell, you know, he was just like desperate to sell it. So he just kept selling and selling and selling and Rob stopped him and he said, do you know the significance of 242? And he said, no. He said, the man that started Starbucks was told no 242 times before he finally got an investor to say yes. He said, you may have gotten several no's here today.

that doesn't mean that you stop. He said, because most people aren't willing to hear 242 no's before they hear a yes. And so he was encouraging him to continue. And I think that for me is I reframed it as every no is one step closer to a yes. I'm refining my pitch. I am changing things based on my responses. And as I did this, it got me better and better at it. It got me closer and closer to it. Now,

Jennifer Whitaker (15:40.814)
you

Lauren Johnson (15:50.79)
I certainly wasn't making any big bucks at this time, but I got to the point where I could quit Starbucks and I was fully sustaining myself.

Jennifer Whitaker (15:57.838)
Hmm.

Lauren Johnson (15:59.658)
And so I really think of it like I had to turn it into a challenge because I knew that I could, could, I could sit through 242 notes to get to that. Yes. And I knew I had something to offer. And so it was like, man, if I can just get in front of people, I know that they're going to want this. I know that they're going to see the need for this. And so for me, I think you have to dig deep and figure out why the hell you're doing it in the first place. And when you connect to that.

Jennifer Whitaker (16:04.706)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (16:28.147)
Man, it's hard. It's hard to compete against it.

Jennifer Whitaker (16:33.332)
And I hear you really owning and knowing your value as well. That's what I also hear coming up. I mean, your story is unique in some ways, but it isn't unique in many ways. When we hear about the greats, we hear about Thomas Edison, like all of these stories are people who continue to go and continue to move until they hit that success. I'm curious too, because we hear so much about burnout right now. What is the balance between keeping

that momentum and going and going and going without driving yourself into the ground as well. Do you have any advice on that?

Lauren Johnson (17:11.946)
You know, it's tough because at the beginning, yeah, you're going to face burnout. I think that that is 100%. Like I look at the beginning of my career and I'm not saying this is the right way to do it, but I will say that at the beginning, you have to work harder. Like it doesn't mean that there aren't smarter ways to do it, but I will say that like you're probably going to have to sacrifice some things. And there's a story of my grandfather that I love. My mom told me this.

And it stuck with me. When she was younger, she was there at the dinner table and my grandpa had just come back from like a three hour commute home from work. And my grandfather was a steward at racetracks. So like Santa Anita, like the big racetracks here in California. And so what that means is he was essentially the referee. He decided who won in a photo finish. Like they gave out any sort of like, you know,

forget the word you want to say, like any, anything, if you do something wrong, like they would issue any of those punishments and all of that. So one day he comes home and he's sitting down at the dinner table and she goes, Hey dad, do you like sitting in traffic? He like starts laughing. He's like, what, what kind of question is that? He's like, no, like why, why do you ask? And she's like, well, every day, like you're driving like two hours to work and two to three hours home. like.

you must like traffic. I never hear you complain about it." And she goes, he goes, well, I don't complain about it because I signed on the line. And she's like, what do you mean? He said, well, when I took the job, I knew what was required of it. No one forced me to sign. I chose it. And so I always think about, you know, before you sign up for your goals, you have to sign up for all that's required of it too.

Jennifer Whitaker (18:53.902)
Mm

Jennifer Whitaker (19:02.99)
Mm

Lauren Johnson (19:03.132)
And I think sometimes when we start out, we think that we should start out at, you know, these massive high rates and we shouldn't have to do anything for free and we shouldn't. And I just call BS on that. think that when you want something and when you're willing to sacrifice at the beginning, because you're playing the long game, that that's the time to do it. And so sometimes it is what's required. It doesn't mean it's right. It doesn't necessarily mean that it's the most.

you know, mentally healthy at the beginning. But I think that when you understand that it's temporary and there is an end to it, for me, it made it okay and it made it worth it. And so now I can recognize when I start to reach burnout and I have a much better balance now. But at the beginning, I can't say I did and I can't say I would have changed anything because I think that it was required of me to get where I wanted to go in the time I wanted to get.

So I think it's just asking yourself that question. If this is what you want, then ask yourself what's required of it. And then are you willing to do what's required? And I think sometimes it comes at a cost.

Jennifer Whitaker (20:13.57)
Very interesting. mean, I can definitely relate. I grew my success and then I left my very lucrative career because of burnout. And I know a lot of women that have very similar stories. It's like they created their success on burnout and now they're in their phase two of trying to create their success or they are creating their success, but doing it in a completely different way. But they're taking what they learn from experiencing burnout so that they have that balance now.

And I don't think that that's necessarily required, even though there's so many examples of women burning out and now they're creating these really great businesses with more balance. I don't know that that's necessarily required, but it really ties into our topic here today on like the setbacks and failures and how we can use those to create success. So tell me a little bit more about what role failure and setbacks have played over the course of your career in creating success.

Lauren Johnson (20:50.953)
Mm.

Lauren Johnson (21:13.19)
man. Yeah, it's a good one though. It's such a good one. I think like immediately what comes to mind with like what role they played is it played a very reflective role.

Jennifer Whitaker (21:14.114)
That's probably a loaded question.

Jennifer Whitaker (21:25.698)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (21:27.476)
You know, sometimes, you know, I'm sure a lot of women, and I mean, including myself, and I know we briefly spoke about it, like experience imposter syndrome. And this idea that, you know, if you look at the Dunning -Kruger effect, what it shows is that when you just start out on something and you know just enough to be dangerous, sometimes we can become over

That's like how I would describe me right out of grad school. I am like on cloud nine. I'm like, I'm about to the world. Like I got all the answers. And then as you start to learn more and more, you start to apply it in the real world, you start to learn how little you actually know. And so then the graph goes from up and it starts to down. And we call that the valley of despair where you're just like, I don't even know if I'm at all for this. Like, am I good enough? Like, I don't even think I know nearly enough that I need to know.

Jennifer Whitaker (21:56.299)
Yeah.

Jennifer Whitaker (22:18.317)
Right.

Lauren Johnson (22:18.6)
And then you start to come to this kind of like middle ground and it's this plateau and it's this idea that, and not plateau meaning you can't grow and develop, but plateau in the fact that you, you understand your circle of competence. And it's important to know that your circle of competence, even though it's, can grow in size, every circle has a boundary. And so we know our limits and we also know the areas we still can learn. And we also know the areas we're masterful in. And so.

Jennifer Whitaker (22:42.072)
Mm

Lauren Johnson (22:47.88)
I think that what failure played for me is it played along this journey for me. And I was like on cloud nine, then I was like, boy, I am a white belt and I have so much to learn. And where now while I still have this white belt mentality of wanting to continue to grow and learn and develop, I think I can look back and pull from those experiences and go, wow.

can get through some pretty big stuff and I can handle some pretty big things. And it doesn't have to be perfect. I can show up imperfectly and still make that impact. So I think it's taught me that mistakes are not the problem. Because if you never make new mistakes, you're not growing. But if you consistently make the same mistake, you're not learning.

Jennifer Whitaker (23:20.162)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (23:42.122)
Yeah, absolutely. What has helped you transform your relationship with failure and imperfection? Have there been any pivotal moments that helped you?

Lauren Johnson (23:56.522)
I mean, I'm sure there are some definite pivotal moments. I'm trying to think of any stories, but what immediately comes to mind is it's just, it causes you to look in the mirror, right? It causes you to face it. And so I always think of like failure as like, failure is not the problem. What's often the problem is our relationship with it. And so I look at our relationship with these things, almost like I call it the grocery store test. So you know when you go to the grocery store and like you see somebody, like you really don't want to see.

Jennifer Whitaker (24:09.56)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (24:26.366)
And like suddenly you're like, I need kale. I need to go on the opposite side of this grocery store and pick up some kale. I've never eaten it before. Probably will throw it in the trash. Today we're going to buy some. And that I would say is probably not a great relationship, right? Like you're running, you're avoiding, you're hiding. You're like, please just don't look my way. Don't make eye contact. And then it's like you pull down like, you know, the ice cream aisle and you see your best friend and you're like,

Jennifer Whitaker (24:26.636)
Right.

Lauren Johnson (24:55.058)
and you run towards each other, you embrace, you probably spend way too much time while your husband's in the car wondering, what the heck is she doing in there? It's like that, those are like those good relationships. You walk out together arm in arm, you're like, who I found. Right? And so that's what I call the grocery test. Like if you ran into failure at the grocery store, what are you doing? Right? What does that look like? And so I think I had to learn to approach it.

Jennifer Whitaker (25:07.137)
Great.

Jennifer Whitaker (25:17.549)
you

Lauren Johnson (25:23.142)
I had to learn to have that difficult conversation with myself, to humble myself enough to distance myself and go, what about this is true? What about it isn't? And so going back to the quote, to the word we used early is you have to get curious about it. You have to spend time with it. You have to be willing to, you know, have a conversation with it, dive into it, explore it a little bit. Where I find people that struggle with failure, it's the ones that avoid the aftermath.

Jennifer Whitaker (25:31.096)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (25:51.614)
They avoid the conversation with it. They avoid the exploration. They avoid the watching themselves on film because, wow, that just hurts to revisit. And so I think that one of the things is I've learned, I used to run, by the way, my grocery store test was not good at the beginning. And I have now learned to lean into it because I found the best, the best lessons have come away from really not being afraid of it.

Jennifer Whitaker (26:00.302)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (26:20.376)
Do you see a difference, because you work with both men and women, do you see a different way of relating to failure and imperfection when it comes to men and women?

Lauren Johnson (26:31.995)
That's a great question. I don't know if I've ever thought of that.

Lauren Johnson (26:39.678)
Yeah, I'm not sure I've thought of that before. I haven't seen anything directly. I'm sure there is if I sit down and really consider.

Lauren Johnson (26:52.21)
I do, one of the things I will say, just thinking through my clients, is that sometimes women tend to identify with it more.

Jennifer Whitaker (27:05.619)
Mm -hmm. Make it mean something about themselves. Yep.

Lauren Johnson (27:08.604)
Yeah, as I'm just kind of thinking through some of my clients, men, it'll take a hit to their confidence, but not a hit to their identity, if that makes sense.

Jennifer Whitaker (27:19.212)
Yes, absolutely, absolutely. And I think it really explains too, there's so many women that I have worked with initially in the beginning phases of our work together. There is this fear that if they fail or if people see their failure that they will be less valuable. And so there is this identity of value and I help them see that.

actually it is the failure that makes them more valuable in the business sense. mean, obviously everybody's valuable, but I wonder too, if you see, sounds like you do, but how do you help others see the value of failure and imperfection?

Lauren Johnson (28:03.791)
Well, one, have to model it yourself. That day in the Starbucks drive -through really revealed a lot to me that for me at that time, I was talking the talk, but I wasn't walking the walk. And so now I have to exercise those things every day. And it's hard. People are like, well, if you're a mental coach, you don't go through this. I'm like, you kidding me? I go through it every day. Every day.

Jennifer Whitaker (28:16.846)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (28:23.554)
Right.

Jennifer Whitaker (28:30.072)
Great, yes, yes.

Lauren Johnson (28:31.912)
I exercise nonstop and it's hard. So because I do that, I can speak to it with you. can relate to my client even better. And so I'm sorry, can you repeat the question? Because it just left my brain.

Jennifer Whitaker (28:39.168)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Yeah.

Jennifer Whitaker (28:45.216)
I, it's left my brain as well. I think I was just asking like really if how you help people see the value of failure. I mean, I'm even, I'm about to go to a women's entrepreneurial conference and the conference is solely the topic is solely on the failure on celebrating failure on women standing up telling their stories about

Lauren Johnson (28:47.824)
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

Jennifer Whitaker (29:14.36)
how they failed, what they've learned, what they would do differently, because we need to normalize failure. I think what you just said was so impactful. And I know it's what really helped me connect to you in our initial conversations is when you are sharing your stories of failure, it creates connection. It shows vulnerability. It's like, okay, you're a coach and you still go through this, because I think sometimes in the coaching world, we're put on this pedestal thinking that like, we have our lives.

perfectly put together, we know it all, we don't go through these failures, we don't stumble, and no, this is consistent daily work that we have to keep revisiting. And so I really appreciate you reminding everyone who's listening that it is something that we have to keep going back to the basics over and over and over again.

Lauren Johnson (30:05.642)
Yeah. And like exactly, it just sparked my memory of like, like a month ago, I think now when I, by the way, I've done like over 80 keynotes in the last, like, you know, handful of years. I do them all the time. Like I love them. I love being on stage. I love like just sharing the, all the news about mental performance with other people and other industries that may not be as well versed in it. And I'm with this client and

everything that could have gone wrong. Technically did. And just so you know, I like bring all my own stuff because I do not trust that anywhere that I go has everything that I need. And so I'm over -prepared. People are like, you have your own clicker. you have your own this. Everything's short of a mic like I have. And I bring with me and I get there and you know, everything's prepped and ready to go. And I go to plug my computer in and their HDMI cord isn't working.

Jennifer Whitaker (31:04.588)
Hmm.

Lauren Johnson (31:05.554)
Now it would have been an easy fix if you could exchange the HDMI cord, except it was one of those that like went under the floor all the way back to the room and the IT room. And I was like, okay. Well, we can't fix that. So now what they're like, we'll bring it back to the IT room. I'm thinking, yeah, they probably have like a, another HDMI cord right there. no, they didn't. And on top of that, the plugin that they had didn't like Mac computers, which is of course what I have. So I was like, Hmm.

And then on top of that, we're about to start and we can't delay because the man going on after me is a massive high up executive in this company and has to leave right after he's done. So he has a hard stop. So I can't go over. So I'm like, well, I don't have slides. I don't have any of my materials or my videos, anything. I just got to get started. So I go up there and I start and you know, when you're, when you, when you speak, you, can feel the connection with the audience.

Jennifer Whitaker (32:05.132)
Right.

Lauren Johnson (32:05.412)
And I could just like, could tell it just like wasn't landing the way I wanted it to. I didn't have that same connection. And I was like, okay, come on, like keep going. Like we got this. And then halfway through they got slides up, but that wasn't my normal. Like as I'm clicking through it, all the animations were gone. It was like a PDF version of it. And so it's like the best they could do for me.

And you know, we finished it. did as best as I possibly could with the circumstances that I had. But I learned two things. Number one, I learned that I rely too much on my slides to keep me on track. So I was like, okay, next time how I'm going to mitigate this is I'm going to print out an outline. God forbid the slides aren't up there. I can go and revert back to the outline just to keep me on track. Cool. That's mitigated. Two, always make sure someone else has a copy.

that is not in the audience. So I'm like, okay, I can do that. Those are two things I learned from that failure. The third thing was after the event, I had all these people coming up to me saying, my gosh, that was amazing. How you handled that was unreal. Like everybody's giving me this praise. You know what my little brain said to me? Well, they're not gonna tell you, you sucked.

Like that's literally what my brain said to me. And I feel like every woman listening to this right now is probably like, yup, like bed there. Like, I don't believe you. You're like, you're good. You're like, thanks. Like, and so that's how I was. And I was like, I just beating up on myself and I just noticed it going on for too long. And I think this is an important thing about failure. And these are things that I talk about with my clients all the time. Fail ups and downs are going to happen. It's how quickly.

Jennifer Whitaker (33:26.158)
point.

Jennifer Whitaker (33:38.466)
Hmm.

Lauren Johnson (33:52.98)
you're able to recover. Like how long does it keep you down? And this was a red flag to me, for me, because it kept me down longer than usual. And I was like, why? So I started to get curious. And that's when I had this conversation with one of my coaches and she brought this up to me and she said, well, I know why. I was like, why? Like, please enlighten me because I don't know. And she said, well, Lauren, you know your impact when you're polished.

Jennifer Whitaker (33:57.486)
Right.

Lauren Johnson (34:20.562)
You know the impact you can make when things are perfect and you're polished. But I'm not certain you've ever considered the actual impact you make when you show human moments like the imperfect one you have.

And I was like, interesting. And it got me thinking. And I went, my gosh, I started looking back into all the mistakes I had made on stage. I was like, in the middle of a women's session, 400 women, I dropped a clicker and it shattered. Like shattered. And broke. Like we could bear, like it was unusable. I felt terrible for the next speaker. I'm like, I'm so sorry, it was an accident. But like that, when that happened, I went back and watched that video.

Jennifer Whitaker (34:49.867)
So,

Lauren Johnson (35:02.398)
I had five women get up and put it together for me and like to the point where it was like, okay, I could use some of it. Not all functionality was there, but that's okay. And like, and then I had women coming up to me afterwards going like, thanks for being human. Like thanks for it. realized it's because it's human. When you show the human side of you, people connect better. People don't relate to perfect. People relate to imperfect.

Jennifer Whitaker (35:16.47)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (35:27.048)
And I just realized, my gosh, here I am. Like I like the imperfect cookie over like the perfectly frosted one. And I'm like, I'm the imperfect cookie right now. Like, and that's what I would prefer anyway. And so instead of rejecting these moments that are, you know, out of my control, you know, despite being prepared, instead of rejecting those and beating myself up, I was like, you might consider how those actually impact people positively. And it just really got me thinking that.

You may not have the impact you want, but you'd be surprised the impact you can have even when you show up.

Jennifer Whitaker (36:02.986)
Mm hmm. It sounds like it was such a great unfolding even more so of worthiness because you knew your worth. I love that you knew your worth when you were making impact, but you didn't know your worth when you didn't make impact. And this was a life's experience that reminded you that you are worthy in both situations, regardless of what's happening externally.

Lauren Johnson (36:31.668)
Yeah, yeah, was kind of a, you know, it's, I've always struggled a bit with perfect, like feeling the need to be perfect. I know where it comes from, you know, it comes from childhood. Like I know exactly the root, but it's interesting. Like every new level requires a somewhat different level of you. And so you'll see these different, these patterns that used to show up in different ways show up in new ways.

Jennifer Whitaker (36:41.461)
I have to, yes.

Mm

Jennifer Whitaker (36:52.152)
does.

Jennifer Whitaker (37:00.558)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (37:00.828)
when you start to level up. And I think this was a new way for me. And I mean, this only happened like a month ago. So this has been, you know, a recent finding for myself. And it's given me just an even deeper understanding of that kind of root system, going back to that early analogy and some of the work I can be doing around it.

Jennifer Whitaker (37:24.974)
It's so beautiful. What are some of the moments that you have coached your clients through failure or imperfection? What did that look like?

Lauren Johnson (37:35.818)
I'll tell you, there was a coach I was working with and I'd helped him build this presentation on details and talking about the little details. Now those little details add up to really big things over time. And he gets up in front of the team and ironically forgets the details of the story that we decided on. And it's going like that.

Not just like bad, bad, like then suddenly he starts telling like a story that the team had all heard before, but then didn't relate to it at all. And it was like, so cheesy and so crazy. I'm no, like bombing, like full on bombing. the team, literally at one point someone said on the team goes like, where's this going? Like, all the now and I'm just sitting here just like, my gosh, this is not good.

Jennifer Whitaker (38:16.915)
no.

Jennifer Whitaker (38:21.375)
Yeah

Jennifer Whitaker (38:31.049)
my gosh.

Lauren Johnson (38:35.188)
So anyway, it ends, we're all happy it ended. Like we leave and I'm like, think, think, Lauren, think, like, what do we do? What do we do? And I'm like, he has to own it. Like he has to own it. And so he sits down with me and he goes, I was bad. I was like, it wasn't good. It wasn't good. And I said, but this is the thing I think that's important. I said, every day you're asking this team.

to step outside of their comfort zone, to take risks, to go all in and understanding that mistakes are a part of the process. You tell them this every day. And I said, here you are being an example of it. You're trying to improve yourself in certain ways and you made a mistake. And so I went back to the phrase I said earlier. I said, if you consistently make the same mistake, you're not learning. But if you never make new mistakes, you're not growing.

Jennifer Whitaker (39:32.472)
Right.

Lauren Johnson (39:33.544)
And so the very next presentation, he stood up and he goes, you guys, I made a big mistake. And he's like, I'm sure you all saw the train wreck. That was the earlier meeting. And he goes, I'm working on A, B and C. And you know, I was, I told, he's like, I told Lauren, like, I'm so upset. Like I can't do this. This is unacceptable. And she stopped me and she told me.

You know, mistakes are part of the process. And if you keep making the same ones, you're not learning. If you never make new ones, you're not growing. And the team like erupted. And it was like, it was as if they all like wrapped their arms around him in that moment is because they, he allowed them to see them as a human. Like he opened up that door, like it showed them behind the scenes of like, that sucks. And I'm here to say, I made a mistake.

Jennifer Whitaker (40:07.631)
Mmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (40:16.536)
Yes.

Lauren Johnson (40:28.698)
I'm working on it and I ask you guys to do this every day. And so here I am taking ownership the same way I would want you to do the same. And it was just this lovely moment of just embracing it. it was people left, they were clapping by the end of it and they left and they gave them hugs and were like, we're so proud of you. It was just like this moment. so I think that it's, again, it's leaning into the discomfort. It's leaning into the uncomfortable

you feelings of growth, I call it the growth zone. Like the growth zone is uncomfortable, it's uncertain, it feels unstable, it feels vulnerable, it feels raw. And when you lean into that feeling and remind yourself, this is the growth zone, I know on the other side of this, there was something even better for me. It allows you to accept it even, you know, even easier. And so that's what he did. And it was such an amazing moment to see the response and the

Jennifer Whitaker (41:15.416)
Hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (41:24.408)
such a beautiful picture, such a beautiful image. I am curious what you think around like what qualities does one have to tap into to be able to own that, to own failure.

Lauren Johnson (41:39.658)
I mean, I think it's acceptance. You know, I always say that if you really boil down mental performance, it's accepting your reality and choosing your response.

Jennifer Whitaker (41:41.763)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (41:50.839)
Accepting your reality and choosing your response.

Lauren Johnson (41:54.684)
You can't move forward without accepting reality.

Like you can't, you can't move forward in a different reality. Like you have to persist, you don't have to like it, okay? I don't want to mix up liking and accepting. Like you don't have to like the reality. I don't have to like the fact that I didn't get promoted. I don't have to like the fact that those people didn't end up hiring me. I didn't have to like the fact that now I'm sitting at Starbucks, but I have to accept it if I'm going to do anything about it. And so I think that what it...

Jennifer Whitaker (42:06.126)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (42:10.946)
Right.

Jennifer Whitaker (42:20.088)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (42:26.797)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (42:29.704)
One of the biggest things is you can't move on from failure if you are not accepting that this happened. And the moment you do it kind of takes its power away. You know, if you've ever been like afraid to do something and then you go and do it and you like accept it in the moment, it like, it's not nearly ever as bad as you think it is.

Jennifer Whitaker (42:35.148)
Right. Right.

Jennifer Whitaker (42:39.682)
Yes.

Jennifer Whitaker (42:48.478)
Yeah, it dissolves the resistance to it.

Lauren Johnson (42:51.482)
Exactly. so, and things that you resist the most last the longest. You know, things that you accept last the shortest. And so if you want to stay in that headspace of failure and I'm terrible and I'm never going to make it, I'm beating myself up, mean, okay, then focus on those things. But if you want to move forward, the idea is to go, okay, I may not like this, but this is the reality.

Jennifer Whitaker (42:57.439)
Exactly.

Jennifer Whitaker (43:01.762)
Right.

Jennifer Whitaker (43:12.6)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (43:20.242)
And instead of saying, me and getting stuck in the cycle of why must, why did this happen? Why me again? Like, and being in that victim mindset and just sticking in with why questions we have to at some point shift to what questions. What now? Yeah. What now? Like what's my next step? What's the next best move? And so for me, like from the, like again, back to the Starbucks story.

Jennifer Whitaker (43:34.178)
Mm -hmm.

Lauren Johnson (43:46.696)
At the beginning, I was like, I was all in the why questions. I was just like, why did this guy say this to me? Like, who does he think he is? You know, all this. And then when I realized it and I accepted the fact that actually the part that stung the most is, was actually true to me. That then it shifted me. Okay. What now? All right. Well, I got to stop waiting for opportunity and I got to go chase it. How do I do that? And it led me towards that path. So I think that.

Jennifer Whitaker (44:06.382)
Mm.

Lauren Johnson (44:14.1)
when it comes to failure, it's accepting your reality, not necessarily liking it, but accepting the truth in front of you is the first step, and then choosing your response at the highest level.

Jennifer Whitaker (44:26.104)
Beautiful. So for all the people who are listening right now, the first thing that they can do to embrace failure is to accept where they are right now. Then what would you recommend them doing next?

Lauren Johnson (44:37.375)
Yes.

Lauren Johnson (44:41.79)
then I would ask themselves the question, what now? Like, what now? Okay, so you accept that you failed, what now? What can I learn from this? How can this make me stronger? What skill might I be building that is preparing me for this next phase in my life? Like, get curious about it, ask questions, spend time with it, right? Evaluate it. And sometimes it's helpful for people to think of it as if they're coaching someone else.

Jennifer Whitaker (44:44.6)
What now?

Jennifer Whitaker (44:49.251)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (44:58.806)
and

Jennifer Whitaker (45:09.485)
Yes.

Lauren Johnson (45:09.64)
Sometimes it's hard when we're reviewing ourselves. So sometimes what I'll recommend to my clients is, okay, let's pretend you're coaching someone else. Like, what would you say to them? How would you answer these questions? And so sometimes it just gives us like a little bit of distant emotional distancing from the moment and allows us to answer it even more effectively. So just a couple strategies there, but I would just start to get curious and I would start to reflect.

Jennifer Whitaker (45:18.998)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (45:26.573)
Right.

Jennifer Whitaker (45:36.694)
You work so much in the strategy, the physical, the mental transformation. Do you see the spiritual weaved into this work as well? And if so, what does that look like?

Lauren Johnson (45:53.154)
It's so different for everyone. But yes, I totally do. I have so many athletes and clients that are spiritual in their own way, regardless of what you believe in. But it goes back to that why and that faith and that belief and those belief systems that they have. And it gives them some comfort in feeling a little sense of being able to let go because there's something greater than them that is involved.

Jennifer Whitaker (45:54.999)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (46:04.098)
right.

Jennifer Whitaker (46:18.37)
Yes.

Lauren Johnson (46:22.634)
So, but it is big. think that there is not only emotional and physical, but that spiritual aspect can be so big in pursuing this because it's something greater than you. It's something, it's that driver that's outside of you, bigger than you that you can continue to push through for. But yeah, I totally wholeheartedly see this not only in companies, but in sports as well.

Jennifer Whitaker (46:49.824)
Yeah, I think the acceptance and the what now, what's next, there is such a spiritual part to that. Acceptance is a form, I think, of surrender in some ways. And the what's next can be a question within ourselves, but it can also be that question that is lifted upward as well or inward of what is next.

Is that the mental next step? Is that the inspired action next step? A combination of both. What is that? And so, yeah, I was really curious to see what you thought about that as well. Yeah.

Lauren Johnson (47:27.6)
Yeah, I think it definitely plays a big role in that acceptance piece. So knowing that there is something, like again, we can't connect the dots looking forward, we can only connect them looking backwards. And therefore, what it forces us to do is trust that somehow this dot we're currently experiencing will connect to our future.

Jennifer Whitaker (47:31.328)
Mm -hmm.

Jennifer Whitaker (47:48.712)
Absolutely. Yeah. Such a great conversation, Lauren. I know that the listeners will be replaying this over and over again. I will too, because I've learned so much in our short time together. Where can they find you and how can they dive more deeply into your work?

Lauren Johnson (48:04.786)
Yeah, they can find the best way to find me is actually on my website, which is laurenjohnsonandco .com. I, you know, a lot, there's a lot of people out there with the name Lauren Johnson. So when I got married, I was like, I love you, but this is nuts. So none of my handles are the same. None of, so that's probably the best way to go find me is on my website because all my socials on there. So LinkedIn and all of that, you can go directly there and you'll be able to find.

Jennifer Whitaker (48:14.176)
you

Jennifer Whitaker (48:29.826)
I will also leave these details in the show notes and you have a midweek mindset tip that you share every week that is fantastic. So everyone definitely needs to sign up minimally for that for their tune up each week.

Lauren Johnson (48:45.93)
Well, thank you. I appreciate that. I started it way back when I was working with the Yankees and it's turned into something so different today and I absolutely love it. So thank you, yes. It's a one minute video every week that pertains to something on the mental side with an action plan that you can apply directly to yourself.

Jennifer Whitaker (49:06.476)
I love it. Beautiful. Well, thank you so much for your time and thank you for being here and sharing your wisdom with us.

Lauren Johnson (49:12.734)
Thank you so much, Jennifer, I appreciate it.

Jennifer Whitaker (49:14.85)
Yeah.

When you think back on your life do you have a few pivotal moments that shaped your life or do you have a lot of micro moments - really small moments that are easily overlooked but shaped who you are over time. or a combination of both? When I look back on my life, where I am today - mentoring women around business and wealth - I believe my path was shaped by micro-moments and pivotal moments. but I also believe my story began before I got here. The women who came before me who molded me into who I am and paved the path to where I am now. I’m going to tell those stories in future episodes but today I’m going to start with the catalyst that began my journey of generating millions over my career by weaving the feminine and money together.

 

20 years ago, I was at one of the lowest points in my life. while driving my beat-up Honda (I literally tied a rope to my bumper to hold it in place), I was too broke and broken for more. I heard the Divine clearly say to me, “You are meant for more.” I knew in my soul this was my truth. I decided in that I was going to reclaim my self-worth and follow my inner voice. I decided that being worthy and wealthy was who I was. It led me to 

 

Afforded me opportunities to travel the world, and create friendships across all socio-economic levels. I am curious by nature and driven to learn from my experiences, so I observed. I observed how the wealthiest in the world talked about money, saved money, invested money, carried themselves, and used their money to transform the world. I observed the relationship they had with money, who was on their financial team. I asked questions. What books on money did they read? What were their biggest lessons in life, business, and money? What are their values and how do they drive the way they use their money? When I was invited to Skoll World Forum, sitting across the lunch table at Oxford University, feeling like I was on the set of a Harry Potter movie, with gargoyles, and long wooden tables, talking to a PBS anchorman, sitting next to presidents of countries, billionaire social investors, and Bono of U2. That’s when I had a flashback to the moment on that tree-lined street. You are meant for more. PAUSE.

 

I suddenly realized that I had been called to philanthropy to do more than just raise money.

 

I was in that position not to just to raise money for worthy causes but to put you in the rooms of the most soul-centered, wealthiest people so that I can transform my relationship with money and be wealthy and teach others to do the same. I didn’t see this the first few years as a fundraiser.

 

That’s what I remembered sitting at the lunch table in Oxford. That I had a special gift and unique insights to share with the world just like every other great person at the Hogwarts table. 

 

This was a pivotal moment for me, because it’s when I started to understand that I was being called to work with money beyond just fundraising. I was being called to share the secrets to financial success from the wealthiest in the world. 

 

I’d love to say that when I had my aha moment at Oxford, I had a linear path to where I am today. But there were many twists in turns largely because at the time I still only understood money from a traditional standpoint - from having mental resiliency and working hard for success. So, on one hand, my wealth was growing from applying what I learned from the wealthiest - every time I set a financial goal for myself, I hit it. But I was exhausted. And miserable.

 

I’ll never forget the moment that changed everything for me. It was Christmas Eve 2021 and while everyone I knew was home with their families and loved ones, I was in a windowless office, sitting under fluorescent lighting, working alone. I remember weeping, holding my face in my hands overwhelmed with exhaustion and shame. I was making more money than ever before but I was alone and working on Christmas Eve. 

 

Here I was so successful in business, but I felt like a failure in life. I wasn’t taking care of my body. I hadn’t worked out consistently in years. I didn’t have a lot of friends in my life. I felt like a failure as a woman because I was in my 40s wasn’t married and didn’t have children. I had put my life on hold thinking when I reach this financial goal, then I’ll focus on having a life. The more I desired my dreams, the more I pushed myself to succeed and make money. That’s what we’ve been taught about desires. In the masculine, when we have a desire, we push for it. Culturally, we are taught to build wealth this way. But I had it backward. The feminine teaches us that when we have a desire, we follow our pleasure to it. 

 

I had to learn how to become wealthy like a woman. Because the root of the word wealth is well, whole, and significantly valuable. I had to reclaim those parts within myself. I had to feel well in my body. I had to feel worthy as a woman outside of society’s expectations. I had to know my value outside of financial and business success.

 

Serendipitously, this moment happened as I was studying to become a certified spiritual director and had begun formally studying the divine feminine.

 

Studying the Divine Feminine felt like I was coming home to myself. I felt whole, alive, and more connected to my true self than ever before. I valued who I was and prioritized what I needed to thrive. I refused to neglect myself and push down the parts of me that I thought I had to hide to survive in an over-masculine world. 

 

Following my studies, I knew that in order for me to truly thrive, I had to bring all of myself – my divine and feminine self – to my life and work. we have plenty of paths to create wealth with our masculine energy. But we didn’t have a path to create wealth with feminine energy. I knew I was being called to fill that gap.

 

That’s when I was inspired to do something revolutionary…I started weaving traditional money strategies and Divine Feminine wisdom together. Shocked, I magnetized my first $100k month…and then my second. 

 

Building wealth doesn’t have to be hard. We can create abundance with ease, joy, and flow.

 

There are so many ways to weave the feminine into money and create magical results like this. If I had to highlight a five of the top processes that helped me create wealth with feminine energy it was…

Mystical mornings

Seeing the sacred in everything

Slowing down and remembering who I am 

Loving it all - both my masculine and feminine sides

Living a wealthy life

Today, I feel more embodied than ever. I truly feel like I am wealthy like a woman. If you’d like to learn how to create wealth with feminine energy, I’ll drop the links in my show notes so you can explore my free and online resources. And if you enjoyed this podcast episode, please leave a 5-star review. Take a snapshot of your review and email it to info@jenwhitaker.com. As a thank you, you’ll receive my free Wealthy Like A Woman guided meditation.